Curmudgeon...ok, yes that's me

I was recently referred to as a...


A bad tempered or surly person.
Irritably sullen and churlish.
A lack of civility
A polite act.
a cranky, crabby, 
whiney, sourpuss

I like the following explanation better.

A curmudgeon's reputation for malevolence is 
undeserved.  We don't hate mankind,
just mankind's absurdities.  We are just
as sensitive as the next person, but hide
our vulnerability beneath a crust of misanthropy,
(distrust of humankind).  We ease the pain by 
turning hurt to humor. Nature has endowed us
with astute perception and sly wit.  We have our
version of the truth which unsettles some, even
though we soften it with humor.

Here are some other

What this is all in reference to was 
the recent show I did in Tustin.
Doing a show on the road is 
a lot of work.
The traveling, setting up,
selling, taking down, being 
nice for hours on end.  Repeating yourself
over and over....basically selling a little piece
of yourself.
For me, I do that with my art.
Here you go...I made this for you...
now can I go back to my studio and
do what I love...which is create.
I don't know about other artists
but for me...It is hard to stand there
and sell, me.  
Plus physically, I feel tired and old!!!!
My mantra is 
"I am to old for this!"
Meaning...can't I just make stuff
and someone else sell it?

Oh Yeah,
That is why 
Bunnies By The Bay exists.
I have surrounded myself with
people who do all that.
They are good at it, experts...
and they like selling and organizing
and running spread sheets as much
as I like sewing and drawing.

But this need to have an identity
and self expression outside of bunnies
has led me to selling my own art.
It is like starting over at 56 and being
all alone without my sisters there to protect me.
(Or as they would say protect others from me.)

I did meet some really nice people, and I love all my
earth angle girls.  We had fun, can't wait to do it 
all again.  But in the moment standing all day on 
a concrete floor...the
CURMUDGEON comes out in me.
Not to the customers and nice, nice people who
come out to see us, just to my fellow artists.

My reward at the end of the day

An Ale...makes that pissy part of me
disappear and I can have fun and laugh at
life and myself.  I will never stop being
honest, and truthful...but I'll work on
my filter system.  In the meantime
I am happy to be home and grateful
to those who understand and love me anyways.

Do you have a curmudgeon in your life?


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Marilyn said...

I do know what you mean about having to sell what you create. I have a difficult time with that and smiling non-stop can be wearing on the soul too.

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